Week 5 Recap
Week 5 in PCOG action has come and gone. Two months remain until FF playoffs begin, and teams are beginning to make their moves. I say teams because currently our league is incredibly top heavy. 9/14 teams currently have winning records, paced by your humble commissioner and tyrant, Andy (4-1). Strangely, I am only 7th in scoring. My record is a function of points against, which is 13/14. It just goes to show you that insight and strategy is not always good enough. Sometimes you just have to wish for your opponent to get unlucky. I view this trend as proof of my faith in the fantasy gods. Praise be their name. TO THE RECAP!
GAME OF THE WEEK
Packer and Seth vs Run CMC
I thought I was being pretty clever and original in my nickname for the WR who takes handoffs from Carolina's RB. A quick google search has put to rest any such illusions.
I figured since I've provided Tyler H with an awesome team name he can have an awesome logo to go along with it. Once again though Tyler's team was not paced by Mr. McCaffery. The Bengals' D/ST cashed in with two fourth quarter TDs, boosting them past Miami and Tyler over S+T. Jared Goff is averaging three passing scores per game over his last two, which sounds awesome until a quick bit of arithmetic yields only one such throw last week. Perhaps Goff's gaff can be blamed on the quick exit of two of his three top targets, as Cooper Kupp went out in the first half with a concussion. He still managed to corral 6 catches for 90 yards and a score. Travis Kelce continues to gain 100+ yards, and Phillip Lindsay is criminally underused in Denver. The big revelation was Graham Gano. 19FPTS is incredible for a kicker, especially when he bangs in a 63 yard game winner as time expires
https://streamable.com/t3ati
Tyler and Seth could not match Aaron's win over evil from last week. I guess we now know who Rachel loves the most. Their collective anything but RB strategy in the draft continues to pay off, as the motley collection of also-rans they trot out laugh in the face of collective fantasy tradition. James White and Matt Brieda combined for 32FPTS. Which barely beat OBJ, who tallied 31.4 in all sorts of ways. 57 PAYDS and a TD combined with 130 RECYDS and another score. His beautiful trick play
https://www.clippituser.tv/c/bnkdwg
is most notable because it looked just like one of Eli's passes: so underthrown that the impeccably gifted athlete he is targeting had to slow down so long he had time to get re-taped. A great play. Zach Ertz is the only thing working in Philly's offense other than the training staff. They did field a perfect lineup this week, but not even roster perfection could net a win.
Final Score: Evil Tyler 140 (3-2) Unknown Tyler and Meathead 137.8 (3-2)
Chalupa Batman vs This week we remember KCR
First and foremost, allow my to honor and salute Johnny MoCo for starting a renaming trend in honor of our dear friend Kaleb. This past week marks not the anniversary of his passing, but another reminder to cherish the time we have with our friends and loved ones. Life is too goddamn short to not live it to the fullest. Johnny bet big on a whiny, brittle collarboned bitch with a giant nose this year. The Peckers are in a tailspin, but that offered tons of garbage time for the hobbled capgunslinger. 442 yards and three TDs from Aaron Rodgers set the mark for all QBs this week. Antonio Brown finally got back on track with Big Ben, with 100+ yards and two scores to show for it. Emmanuel Sanders, AB's former teammate, could not replicate his buddy's production with only 11.7 FPTS. All in all Johnny's reliance on the Denver Donkeys sunk his ship, exemplified by the -1 their D/ST "scored".
Jordan's busy schedule includes time to whip up on a good friend. Her team continues to be powered by RBs, with James Conner and Sony Michel combining for 61.8FPTS. Conner and Michel are being buoyed by teammates, with Conner taking the news that Le'Veon possibly returning after the bye week (Sell!Sell!Sell!Sell!Sell High While You Can!) and Michel
https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/cfaf3408-5b69-4ce7-91fe-5259077e86d3
having a clear-ish route to production with Rex Burkhead on the shelf. Tyler Lockett overcame my analysis with Baldwin's return and scored 18.2 FPTS against the LAms. Alex Smith showed why KC showed him the door, as in must-pass situations in catch-up time he came up short and inaccurate on MNF. All in all maternal instincts proved viable for FF as Jordan emerged with a win.
Final Score: Jordan 116.5 (2-3) Johnny 109.4 (2-3)
For Papa Bear vs Salmon Pan
We've already seen Saquon's catch and run against the Panthers. Graham is a dedicated Panthers fan, and his week showed why FF is the devil. Rooting for your Fantasy team members who are playing against your NFL team is heartbreaking. Rooting for your Fantasy Team members who are on a hated rival is worse. Our collective phones were blowing up Monday night as these two went head to head. Deshaun Watson lit up Dallas Sunday night in overtime, and Chris Thompson capitalized on the poor game script and AD's injury Monday night. The only thing more perplexing than Alex Collins' usage is Michael Thomas' falling off a cliff. He went from a record setting pace to watching an undrafted rookie score two TDs against Washington. I would like to commend the balls on you for starting Geoff Swaim, who emerged from a fruitless TE committee in Dallas to score his first career TD. With that position being such a wasteland, any streamer (or nominal starter) who gets in the end zone is a good call.
Unfortunately for Graham, Troy had more chips on the Houston marker than the Cracker did. DeAndre Hopkins spammed the goddamned B button on this long catch to set the Texans up for the OT win BECAUSE JASON GARRETT IS A NUTLESS SCUMBAG WHO SHOULD HAVE RUN THE FUCKING BALL WITH FOURTH AND ONE IN THAT VERY SAME OT, UTILIZING AN AMAZING RB AND SOMEWHAT LESSENED BUT STILL DOMINANT OFFENSIVE LINE.
https://streamable.com/pc8fr
But the Clapper preferred to play for a tie. And should therefore die. Alfred Blue was the other productive Houston chip, and he chipped in 20+ FPTS for team Salmon Pan. The recently traded for David Johnson finally got going, with 24.6 FPTS on 23407203948 touches against the 4-9ers. As he mentioned in the group text, Jay Ajayi is up for trade due to an ACL tear that has put him on the surgeon's table.
Final Score: Troy 125.4 (1-4) Graham 112.3 (3-2)
Remote threw The TV Screen vs Tauben Time 0-4
We have already highlighted how several PCOG members renamed their teams to honor our buddy. My name is from my favorite story about Kaleb. I had only been in Boone for a couple weeks, and due to PROTECTING YOUR FREEDOMS IN IRAQISTAN had missed out on Tebowmania in the 2011 NFL season. I returned in December of that year, and was bewildered by the collegiate all-star and NFL flash-in-the-pan leading the former moribund Denver Donkeys to the playoffs. They were matched up against Pittsburgh, Kaleb's team, in the Wild Card round of the playoffs. This game was to be played at Mile High because the AFC West was atrocious at the time and the Steelers couldn't beat out the eventual SB champ Ravens for the division. Tebow leads the Broncos all the way back to tie the game and send it to overtime. Here comes the story. Kaleb, emotionally distant and calm man that he is, tomahawked his TV remote through his screen in the fourth quarter. Cue a frantic screaming phone call to Bryan, who cleared him to come watch the end of the game at our house. I had been briefed on what happened at Kaleb's house and almost missed this play attempting to protect my television.
He storms out. My screen was safe. Many more afternoons and evenings were spent with him, watching football and laughing our balls off.
This week I should have changed my name to Gordon and Company. The Charger continues to power my team, totalling 24.8 FPTS against the Raiders. Robert Woods took advantage of his running mates going down and scored 17.5 as the noly viable WR in the second half. Matthew Stafford didn't have to do much against the Pack, as they got out to a 24-0 lead and sat on the ball. One would think that Kerryon Johnson would have had a better day and he should have, but he was vultured twice (2x) by the lumbering corpse that is Legarrette Blount.
Shirtless Josh is flailing wildly against the slings and arrows of fate and fantasy. He traded away DJ just in time to watch him light it up for Troy. His new RB, Derrick Henry, should have had a great time against the hapless Bills but fell short. Latavius Murray showed just why he is the second back for the Vikes. Cam Newton was taking notes as a WR showed that one does not necessarily have to overthrow deep targets. Keenan Allen has been close but not quite all year. John Brown finally fell back to earth against the Browns?????
Final Score: Andy 104.7 (4-1) Josh 84.6 (0-5)
Don't Fournette About Me vs Freedom Rides Shotgun
We are all aware of the vagaries of destiny in FF. I certainly hope that Jeremy played the stupid tax this week, because he hit the Powerball RB jackpot this week. Isaiah Crowell, he who is supremely talented and breaks off 4 or more 70+ yard runs per season, which inevitably increases his yards per carry and makes him look palatable in the offseason, went crazy against Denver. 215 yards on 15 carries equals 43.4 FPTS. Here is his big TD run.
https://twitter.com/NFL/status/1048992634503540736
Tom Brady did his best Patrick Mahomes impression on TNF, strafing the Colts for 30.3 FPTS. JuJu was hamstrung by AB's re-emergence, but the Cardinals contributed 17 FPTS.
Bryan continues to rack up RB points, with Zeke, Hyde and Mixon contributing 54.4 FPTS. Felipe Rios could have had a much bigger day but settled for 24.6. Bryan's Achilles Heel is his WR "production", with 6.9 total points from two starters.
I'm certainly not going to trade you one though.
Final Score: Jeremy 142.4 (3-2) Bryan 112.4 (3-2)
Big Ried 1 vs Something Clever
As the Chiefs go, so goes Eric. He has consistently relied on Mahomes' ridiculous passing production to power his team. Against the Jags, he could not find quite the levels of success that he did against lesser defenses. While he did score another rushing touchdown, his first two picks of the year did not help his fantasy day. Kareem Hunt contributed another running TD and 21.4 FPTS. Davante Adams gutted through a hamstring injury for the Pack and was the best target on the field for A-A-Ron. AD dislocated his shoulder in the first half against the Saints, and Amari Cooper continued his on-again off-again ways. Eric Ebron had a big day for the Colts. On second examination, how did you lose this game? Not starting anyone in the FLEX position probably contributed. But not even an optimal lineup would have netted a win this week.
Jared's patience paid off big this week. Sitting on Mark Ingram for four weeks had to suck, but two TDs in his first game of the season is a pleasant boon. Enjoy sitting him again in his bye week. Todd Gurley helped to mash the Seahawks for the win, and Andrew Luck had 24.1 against the Pats on Thursday. TJ Yeldon continues to produce in Fournette's place. On a closer look, it appears that Jared's FF strategy is to draft every player that ever played for Alabama. Yeldon, Ridley, Ingram. Kia, beware any trade from him where he tries to get Julio.
Final Score: Jared 145.7 (3-2) Eric 129.9 (3-2)
Oakland Hodors vs JuJuJulio.
Aaron and Jordan's upcoming baby shower is proof that he is not shooting blanks, but after last week's explosion I guess he just couldn't get it up this time. Cousins to Thielen continues to be huge, AJ Green "only" had 15.8 FPTS and Aaron Jones got game scripted against the Lions. The real revelation is that Alvin Kamara's touches sank through the basement with the return on Ingram. Some of this could probably be chalked up to the overwhelming lead the Saints built up so early, but this has to be a warning sign for the rest of the year. Oh well, you'll always have September of 2018.
Final Score: Kia 101.5 (2-3) Aaron 87.5 (3-2)
Week 6 Preview
MAIN EVENT- Big Brothers Brawl: Andy 4-1 vs Bryan 3-2
Aaron 3-2 vs Jeremy 3-2
Johnny 2-3 vs Eric 3-2
Jordan 2-3 vs Graham 3-2
Kia 2-3 vs S+T 3-2
Jared 3-2 vs Josh 0-5
Troy 1-4 vs Tyler 3-2
Detroit and New Orleans are on bye this week. Yet another hurricane is threatening the low lying areas of the Southeast. How about we all move back to the High Country and laugh at such storms, until we are buried under snow in Boone when Winter finally Arrives. It's almost hoodie weather so the bitch is well on her way.
GAME OF THE WEEK
Packer and Seth vs Run CMC
I thought I was being pretty clever and original in my nickname for the WR who takes handoffs from Carolina's RB. A quick google search has put to rest any such illusions.
I figured since I've provided Tyler H with an awesome team name he can have an awesome logo to go along with it. Once again though Tyler's team was not paced by Mr. McCaffery. The Bengals' D/ST cashed in with two fourth quarter TDs, boosting them past Miami and Tyler over S+T. Jared Goff is averaging three passing scores per game over his last two, which sounds awesome until a quick bit of arithmetic yields only one such throw last week. Perhaps Goff's gaff can be blamed on the quick exit of two of his three top targets, as Cooper Kupp went out in the first half with a concussion. He still managed to corral 6 catches for 90 yards and a score. Travis Kelce continues to gain 100+ yards, and Phillip Lindsay is criminally underused in Denver. The big revelation was Graham Gano. 19FPTS is incredible for a kicker, especially when he bangs in a 63 yard game winner as time expires
https://streamable.com/t3ati
Tyler and Seth could not match Aaron's win over evil from last week. I guess we now know who Rachel loves the most. Their collective anything but RB strategy in the draft continues to pay off, as the motley collection of also-rans they trot out laugh in the face of collective fantasy tradition. James White and Matt Brieda combined for 32FPTS. Which barely beat OBJ, who tallied 31.4 in all sorts of ways. 57 PAYDS and a TD combined with 130 RECYDS and another score. His beautiful trick play
https://www.clippituser.tv/c/bnkdwg
is most notable because it looked just like one of Eli's passes: so underthrown that the impeccably gifted athlete he is targeting had to slow down so long he had time to get re-taped. A great play. Zach Ertz is the only thing working in Philly's offense other than the training staff. They did field a perfect lineup this week, but not even roster perfection could net a win.
Final Score: Evil Tyler 140 (3-2) Unknown Tyler and Meathead 137.8 (3-2)
Chalupa Batman vs This week we remember KCR
First and foremost, allow my to honor and salute Johnny MoCo for starting a renaming trend in honor of our dear friend Kaleb. This past week marks not the anniversary of his passing, but another reminder to cherish the time we have with our friends and loved ones. Life is too goddamn short to not live it to the fullest. Johnny bet big on a whiny, brittle collarboned bitch with a giant nose this year. The Peckers are in a tailspin, but that offered tons of garbage time for the hobbled capgunslinger. 442 yards and three TDs from Aaron Rodgers set the mark for all QBs this week. Antonio Brown finally got back on track with Big Ben, with 100+ yards and two scores to show for it. Emmanuel Sanders, AB's former teammate, could not replicate his buddy's production with only 11.7 FPTS. All in all Johnny's reliance on the Denver Donkeys sunk his ship, exemplified by the -1 their D/ST "scored".
Jordan's busy schedule includes time to whip up on a good friend. Her team continues to be powered by RBs, with James Conner and Sony Michel combining for 61.8FPTS. Conner and Michel are being buoyed by teammates, with Conner taking the news that Le'Veon possibly returning after the bye week (Sell!Sell!Sell!Sell!Sell High While You Can!) and Michel
https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/cfaf3408-5b69-4ce7-91fe-5259077e86d3
having a clear-ish route to production with Rex Burkhead on the shelf. Tyler Lockett overcame my analysis with Baldwin's return and scored 18.2 FPTS against the LAms. Alex Smith showed why KC showed him the door, as in must-pass situations in catch-up time he came up short and inaccurate on MNF. All in all maternal instincts proved viable for FF as Jordan emerged with a win.
Final Score: Jordan 116.5 (2-3) Johnny 109.4 (2-3)
For Papa Bear vs Salmon Pan
We've already seen Saquon's catch and run against the Panthers. Graham is a dedicated Panthers fan, and his week showed why FF is the devil. Rooting for your Fantasy team members who are playing against your NFL team is heartbreaking. Rooting for your Fantasy Team members who are on a hated rival is worse. Our collective phones were blowing up Monday night as these two went head to head. Deshaun Watson lit up Dallas Sunday night in overtime, and Chris Thompson capitalized on the poor game script and AD's injury Monday night. The only thing more perplexing than Alex Collins' usage is Michael Thomas' falling off a cliff. He went from a record setting pace to watching an undrafted rookie score two TDs against Washington. I would like to commend the balls on you for starting Geoff Swaim, who emerged from a fruitless TE committee in Dallas to score his first career TD. With that position being such a wasteland, any streamer (or nominal starter) who gets in the end zone is a good call.
Unfortunately for Graham, Troy had more chips on the Houston marker than the Cracker did. DeAndre Hopkins spammed the goddamned B button on this long catch to set the Texans up for the OT win BECAUSE JASON GARRETT IS A NUTLESS SCUMBAG WHO SHOULD HAVE RUN THE FUCKING BALL WITH FOURTH AND ONE IN THAT VERY SAME OT, UTILIZING AN AMAZING RB AND SOMEWHAT LESSENED BUT STILL DOMINANT OFFENSIVE LINE.
https://streamable.com/pc8fr
But the Clapper preferred to play for a tie. And should therefore die. Alfred Blue was the other productive Houston chip, and he chipped in 20+ FPTS for team Salmon Pan. The recently traded for David Johnson finally got going, with 24.6 FPTS on 23407203948 touches against the 4-9ers. As he mentioned in the group text, Jay Ajayi is up for trade due to an ACL tear that has put him on the surgeon's table.
Final Score: Troy 125.4 (1-4) Graham 112.3 (3-2)
Remote threw The TV Screen vs Tauben Time 0-4
We have already highlighted how several PCOG members renamed their teams to honor our buddy. My name is from my favorite story about Kaleb. I had only been in Boone for a couple weeks, and due to PROTECTING YOUR FREEDOMS IN IRAQISTAN had missed out on Tebowmania in the 2011 NFL season. I returned in December of that year, and was bewildered by the collegiate all-star and NFL flash-in-the-pan leading the former moribund Denver Donkeys to the playoffs. They were matched up against Pittsburgh, Kaleb's team, in the Wild Card round of the playoffs. This game was to be played at Mile High because the AFC West was atrocious at the time and the Steelers couldn't beat out the eventual SB champ Ravens for the division. Tebow leads the Broncos all the way back to tie the game and send it to overtime. Here comes the story. Kaleb, emotionally distant and calm man that he is, tomahawked his TV remote through his screen in the fourth quarter. Cue a frantic screaming phone call to Bryan, who cleared him to come watch the end of the game at our house. I had been briefed on what happened at Kaleb's house and almost missed this play attempting to protect my television.
He storms out. My screen was safe. Many more afternoons and evenings were spent with him, watching football and laughing our balls off.
This week I should have changed my name to Gordon and Company. The Charger continues to power my team, totalling 24.8 FPTS against the Raiders. Robert Woods took advantage of his running mates going down and scored 17.5 as the noly viable WR in the second half. Matthew Stafford didn't have to do much against the Pack, as they got out to a 24-0 lead and sat on the ball. One would think that Kerryon Johnson would have had a better day and he should have, but he was vultured twice (2x) by the lumbering corpse that is Legarrette Blount.
Shirtless Josh is flailing wildly against the slings and arrows of fate and fantasy. He traded away DJ just in time to watch him light it up for Troy. His new RB, Derrick Henry, should have had a great time against the hapless Bills but fell short. Latavius Murray showed just why he is the second back for the Vikes. Cam Newton was taking notes as a WR showed that one does not necessarily have to overthrow deep targets. Keenan Allen has been close but not quite all year. John Brown finally fell back to earth against the Browns?????
Final Score: Andy 104.7 (4-1) Josh 84.6 (0-5)
Don't Fournette About Me vs Freedom Rides Shotgun
We are all aware of the vagaries of destiny in FF. I certainly hope that Jeremy played the stupid tax this week, because he hit the Powerball RB jackpot this week. Isaiah Crowell, he who is supremely talented and breaks off 4 or more 70+ yard runs per season, which inevitably increases his yards per carry and makes him look palatable in the offseason, went crazy against Denver. 215 yards on 15 carries equals 43.4 FPTS. Here is his big TD run.
https://twitter.com/NFL/status/1048992634503540736
Tom Brady did his best Patrick Mahomes impression on TNF, strafing the Colts for 30.3 FPTS. JuJu was hamstrung by AB's re-emergence, but the Cardinals contributed 17 FPTS.
Bryan continues to rack up RB points, with Zeke, Hyde and Mixon contributing 54.4 FPTS. Felipe Rios could have had a much bigger day but settled for 24.6. Bryan's Achilles Heel is his WR "production", with 6.9 total points from two starters.
I'm certainly not going to trade you one though.
Final Score: Jeremy 142.4 (3-2) Bryan 112.4 (3-2)
Big Ried 1 vs Something Clever
As the Chiefs go, so goes Eric. He has consistently relied on Mahomes' ridiculous passing production to power his team. Against the Jags, he could not find quite the levels of success that he did against lesser defenses. While he did score another rushing touchdown, his first two picks of the year did not help his fantasy day. Kareem Hunt contributed another running TD and 21.4 FPTS. Davante Adams gutted through a hamstring injury for the Pack and was the best target on the field for A-A-Ron. AD dislocated his shoulder in the first half against the Saints, and Amari Cooper continued his on-again off-again ways. Eric Ebron had a big day for the Colts. On second examination, how did you lose this game? Not starting anyone in the FLEX position probably contributed. But not even an optimal lineup would have netted a win this week.
Jared's patience paid off big this week. Sitting on Mark Ingram for four weeks had to suck, but two TDs in his first game of the season is a pleasant boon. Enjoy sitting him again in his bye week. Todd Gurley helped to mash the Seahawks for the win, and Andrew Luck had 24.1 against the Pats on Thursday. TJ Yeldon continues to produce in Fournette's place. On a closer look, it appears that Jared's FF strategy is to draft every player that ever played for Alabama. Yeldon, Ridley, Ingram. Kia, beware any trade from him where he tries to get Julio.
Final Score: Jared 145.7 (3-2) Eric 129.9 (3-2)
Oakland Hodors vs JuJuJulio.
Aaron and Jordan's upcoming baby shower is proof that he is not shooting blanks, but after last week's explosion I guess he just couldn't get it up this time. Cousins to Thielen continues to be huge, AJ Green "only" had 15.8 FPTS and Aaron Jones got game scripted against the Lions. The real revelation is that Alvin Kamara's touches sank through the basement with the return on Ingram. Some of this could probably be chalked up to the overwhelming lead the Saints built up so early, but this has to be a warning sign for the rest of the year. Oh well, you'll always have September of 2018.
Final Score: Kia 101.5 (2-3) Aaron 87.5 (3-2)
Week 6 Preview
MAIN EVENT- Big Brothers Brawl: Andy 4-1 vs Bryan 3-2
Aaron 3-2 vs Jeremy 3-2
Johnny 2-3 vs Eric 3-2
Jordan 2-3 vs Graham 3-2
Kia 2-3 vs S+T 3-2
Jared 3-2 vs Josh 0-5
Troy 1-4 vs Tyler 3-2
Detroit and New Orleans are on bye this week. Yet another hurricane is threatening the low lying areas of the Southeast. How about we all move back to the High Country and laugh at such storms, until we are buried under snow in Boone when Winter finally Arrives. It's almost hoodie weather so the bitch is well on her way.
No comments:
Post a Comment